There are days when I feel wrong.
I wake up with an empty feeling in my... stomach? head? heart? all of the previous actually.
I do the things that I should be doing and yet feel as if I'm getting no where.
I look around me and seem unable to interact properly with anything or anybody.
I go online and see my friends there on MSN or AIM and log on , search my suddenly empty brain for something/anything to talk to them about, and log off again as I can't find a single thing to say.
Even to the people that I wanted to talk to so urgently a second earlier.
So what do i do?
I escape into a book.
I escape into other peoples lives.
So that i can ignore my own.
Maybe one day soon I'll be able to deal with my own life enough so that I dont have to escape anymore.
2 comments:
hope you're feeling ok and had a good xmas!
i'm pretty sure my wrist *isn't* broken, but then again who knows? if it's still causing trouble next week i might get it looked at again - it's cracking a lot but it tends to do that most of the time anyway. I'm keeping the support on it 'cos it's stopping me from aggravating it too much, but I think it'll be ok. And yes, I know how badly it stinks when you've had a pot on - the smell makes me almost puke every time I have a patient who's just had their pot taken off, and I'm "used" to it now! :D
have a lovely new year - must speak soon!
xxxxx
Escaping into other people's lives. I'm very familiar with that form of avoidance. I did quite a bit of that myself at the end of 2006. My escapism was the complete set of Sex and the City DVD's and several bags of Chips Ahoy. Lousy for the diet, but it was like a mental vacation and I'm ready to get back to my life now. Hope the New Year brings good things to you.
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