There are days when I feel wrong.
I wake up with an empty feeling in my... stomach? head? heart? all of the previous actually.
I do the things that I should be doing and yet feel as if I'm getting no where.
I look around me and seem unable to interact properly with anything or anybody.
I go online and see my friends there on MSN or AIM and log on , search my suddenly empty brain for something/anything to talk to them about, and log off again as I can't find a single thing to say.
Even to the people that I wanted to talk to so urgently a second earlier.
So what do i do?
I escape into a book.
I escape into other peoples lives.
So that i can ignore my own.
Maybe one day soon I'll be able to deal with my own life enough so that I dont have to escape anymore.
This is a training exercise for the stuff that I will no doubt talk to myself loudly about in the sreet once my marbles go completely, because I absolutely intend to grow old disgracefully. In the unlikely event that this should be read by someone who actually knows the flesh and blood me, please note that all opinions, mad ideas and general thought-streams are mine alone and have no bearing on those of my employers, workmates or relatives [ blood or otherwise ]
Monday, December 11, 2006
A week off work.
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